We live in a foreign country, where English is not the spoken language. The children and me are able to speak basic Dutch. Well, admittedly they are better since they learn it by immersion and I have to go to a language class for adults and learn it by a fixed course schedule.
As an expat I live a life in limbo, tentatively and cautiously, and in waiting. I don’t know for what, it’s just like I un-pause some moments or parts of my life that I absolutely have to live.
All other big decisions are in storage for now. There is no way we are going to settle here. When friends ask why, there are many reasons, some convincing, some ambiguous – parents, culture, motherland, etc. I don’t remember a time in my life when I was so patriotic as I am now. I am so closely following the count-down to the 2014 general elections. I need to see if I can get the Aadhar card on my forthcoming trip. On weekends, we have a Hindi only rule at home with each other, which means only the husband and me talk, and for a change the kids listen. 🙂 Similarly, I question those who want to stay here permanently. I don’t understand their reasons either, to each his own.
Here, we were at home in an apartment, after all it’s close to the park. And life in our city back home would’ve been the same. The kids are happy with the school, and we all have some friends to get by. I have been considering the next step in my placid life. So when the husband firmed our plants to move out to the interior a bit, to a house with a small garden, we reacted fiercely – woken up from our languorous slumber.
Our life is to be turned topsy-turvy. Changes do that to you. New directions, new connections. Bye bye to the old and known way of life. But then, why are we so resistant to the change? Suddenly, this small and quiet place which I have on many occasions lamented for its limitations has become most loved.
I listed every reason compelling which would make the husband see reason. His commute to work. No problem, it will be good for discipline. My life here, and friends, I ask. Life does not stop in a new place, you will find friends, rather nodding acquaintances there too. Not that I drop into my friends’ place everyday, we always plan in advance.
The last and most precise Brahmastra was the kids and their school – they have friends, they are well settled and happy. A new phase of adjustment all over again. Why? In 2 years max, I am planning to return home, again for their education. The husband focuses on the now. Experiencing change is not a bad thing. Let them jump and play around to their heart’s content for a while and not be disciplined by the downstairs neighbour’s thumping of the ceiling.
A move has been imminent, I realise. We had taken to walking on tip-toes for a while and constantly rebuking the children from running around. The only question was a move so far. The children have taken it very well. They are excited about living in a house with a garden. Will there be a school there too? And is there a park and a library? Yipee!
Me, I have resigned to being disciplined in managing house and having a few more window panes to clean. Maybe I could grow a herb garden. Remembering to water the plants, help me get back to nature. We will be exploring a new part of the country. What will we discover around the corner. If nothing, even help define a little bit of ‘Indian’ to those with curiosity about our culture. The inertia and lethargy of my daily existence has been cast away. I am making lists and collecting cartons from all the super-markets in the vicinity. Change is the only constant.
Vibha, aka Chatty Wren, is a full-time mother to two delightful little girls. She blogs at http://wrenwarbles.blogspot.com about her life with her little ones, ups and downs of living in a foreign country and anything else that catches her fancy.