• Gauri

    Absolutely, Reema. I’d penned this on my blog yesterday. I do strongly believe that we, as parents, have a responsibility in doing our bit to raise a future generation that is more empathetic, more sensitive and responsible. We, as parents, do need to bear in mind that the message sent out is not just “don’t get raped”. The more important one, imho, is sending the “don’t rape” message out to the future generations.

    • Reema Sahay

      Certainly Gauri. That a woman or anybody needs to be respected, has to be inculcated in our kids from the beginning. They imbibe the culture they see. Moreover, I strongly believe that the main reason so many cases are happening everywhere is because the perpetrators know it is not easy for anybody to come out in the open and charge them. When the social stigma associated with such cases will go, then only people will fear consequences; otherwise only sterner punishments cannot act as deterrents.

  • Dr Chander Asrani

    Hi! Reema

    It is definitely parenting as it clearly shows – how the parents of perpetrators have failed! We have to inculcate the feeling of respecting the other gender. We also don’t want teenage girls begin hating all boys for such incidents.

    I am of the opinion that if a parent protects the rape perpetrator under
    the ‘minor’ umbrella, they themselves should be held responsible (unless of
    course, they have publicly disowned them).

    • Reema Sahay

      Very true. At individual level, we have to make sure that we are providing a good ‘upbringing’. Certainly how a child has been raised makes a huge difference, apart from other things. This, in the long run, will address the issue of ‘making of a perpetrator’.
      Besides, at a community level, we must get over the stigma attached with rape and such crimes. When victims of such crimes would feel free and confident to come out in the open to report these crimes, then we will address ‘punishing the criminal’.
      And unless both happens, stricter laws will be of little help [of course, more severe punishments are needed].

  • स्वाति जैन

    absolutely… its onus on us to change the viewpoint… there was one FB post doing rounds…where girl/victim was supported by her family, got married and have kids now and all that happened to her was now a faded memory…
    May God give wisdom to people to use their mind, energy and soul at correct places..

    • Reema Sahay

      Well said Swati. May we see more such cases. Look at this young Mumbai girl. She refuses to bog down by the weight of this crime or by social stigma. She said she would report back to her work at the earliest. She walked out of the hospital without covering her face. We need more such women.

  • “If we really want to move ahead, let us just stop making so much noise about rape. Yes, it is unfortunate but a life is much more precious and a ‘survivor’ must not be forced to carry around the weight of this one experience throughout her life.” – VERY INTERESTING THOUGHT, Reema! Indeed, harping on the victim, what happened, and how, by whom – replayed on and on on TV channels can be quite traumatic for those who went through this, apart from reducing a dreadful incident to news bytes and Live telecasts. Great post!

    • Reema Sahay

      Thank you so much Sakshi. We have to do things differently to get different results. Just sterner laws cannot stop this crime. The biggest issue is the confidence of perpetrators that their crime will not be reported. Moreover, the second aspect is questioning the girl’s situation to justify the crime! Dealing with rape is not as simple as just making sterner laws [which obviously is also needed].

  • Afshan Shaik

    I read sohaila”s article long back and cried actually. Brilliantly written Reema. The social stigma attached to it shud get eradicated. Rape survivor was a victim not the criminal. She shud be motivated and she doesnt deserve the suffering after the crime 🙁

    • Reema Sahay

      Thank you so much Afshan 🙂 We all know it is just not a simple case of harsher punishment to stop rape cases, had it been that murders would have been negligible by now. But that is not the case. We need severe punishments, we need social support, we need equal rights for women in public places, we need a shift in how we look at women/ girls, we need so many things to achieve that.