Have you ever witnessed this in your home or at a get-together elsewhere…
- Kids jumping up and down on the sofa and some with their shoes on too.
- Kids driving toy cars or playing with Jenga blocks on the glass table top.
- Kids insisting on playing with delicate show pieces and artefacts and in process breaking or damaging them.
- Kids balancing their plates stuffed with food and walking all over the house and then spilling food and drinks all over- on themselves, floor, chairs, bed, sofa… thereby creating a mess of the whole place.
- Kids adamant on taking some of the toys back home with them.
How many times it has happened that after a get-together with kids, the house looks that it has been hit by a hurricane. With toys lying all around and a few at some unreachable places, with food and cold drinks spilt around, something broken or damaged, a home like this can give anybody a few panic attacks.
You sit in a group and a child would not let his mother talk. Somebody would whine incessantly. While yet another one would cry non-stop.
Well, we all have witnessed this and much more, at some or the other time. All children misbehave from time to time. And they like to push their boundaries from time to time too. Somebody very rightly said that the characteristic of a normal child is he doesn’t act that way very often!
This kind of behaviour from kids with other people around, generally disappoints, bewilders, embarrasses, shocks, irritates and annoys us all. Some vow never to have parties with kids at home and many simply dread children coming over to their place.
Misbehaviour by our kids outside our homes is very upsetting for most of us, as we believe ourselves to be perfect parents of perfect children. But incidentally, we are neither perfect parents and nor are our children.
There are many reasons for a child’s misbehaviour, and there are numerous ways in which a parent can divert this unruly behaviour. The reasons have to be discovered and understood and strategies to deal with the same have to be learnt and practiced. A parent is truly responsible for his child’s behaviour. It is certainly a parent’s responsibility to let the child know about what’s acceptable and what’s not.
The process of disciplining a child is a long one and involves a lot of time, efforts, patience and perseverance and this cannot be achieved overnight. However, the results are very rewarding and worth the while.
I believe as a responsible parent, can we be near the children when they are eating, monitoring them or helping them and generally ensuring that they eat well and of course without any mess around.
Breaking or damaging anything and anywhere is a big NO, so the same rule applies at the host’s home too!
And jumping on a sofa with shoes!! Who would approve of that?
Keeping the toys back at their respective places or tidying up the place a bit, will help the child learn a lot too.
Children are like wet clay, you can mould them in any shape. And, also children need love, especially when they do not deserve it.
Some quick pointers…
|Give in||Set clear boundaries|
|Bribe inappropriately||Listen to your child|
|Forget to praise and have fun||Tune in to how they are feeling|
Just think, what is your host’s purpose in having a party? Surely not for you to enjoy yourself; if that were their sole purpose, they’d have simply sent champagne and food over to your place by taxi!!
How has been your experience of partying with kids at home?
Discipline Guidelines Courtesy : The Independent
A former pharmaceutical professional-turned-soft-skills facilitator for corporates and mother of a 11 year old, Shilpa Garg blogs at http://shilpaagarg.blogspot.in/