As parents we are very proud of our kids. The littlest of their achievements make us glow brighter than the moon. We do everything in our power to make them happy, to help them achieve greater heights and grow as a better human. We do our best to win the ‘Best Parent’ trophy. Selflessly and selfishly we trot around to mold our kids into the best human beings.
All these efforts are wasted if children don’t communicate with their parents as they grow up. Yes, as friendships bloom, parents take a back seat in a kid’s life. But when it comes to matters that need parental guidance they should be able to approach us without fear. Wouldn’t it be nice if our school going kids come to us at the end of the day to share little nuggets of experience from their day? And wouldn’t it be awesome if our kids know that we are here for them always, no matter what?
How would you build that sort of a relationship without fear and judgment?
By talking to your child.
I know that look on your face. Who doesn’t talk to their own kids? What kind of advice is that?
Kids are exhausting. Parents will never have the energy to keep up with their kids. We have to cook for them, make sure they are well fed, teach them, clarify their doubts, read to them, take them to the park, school, and everywhere else, break up their fights, and so on and so forth. Between these tiring tasks there is one thing that we forget. Talking to our kids, as in having a sensible conversation.
Most of the times we talk to kids with dos and don’ts. As they grow up the effect of these dos and don’ts on them reduces and as a result, there won’t be much interaction between the kids and parents. And that is why parents must make time to converse with the little ones. Otherwise, as they grow up, kids will not learn to have a conversation with their parents. Because well, if the conversations in the previous times largely consisted of “Don’t do that”, “Do this”, “No, you are not allowed”, “Eat well”, “Read that”, then it is natural that we fail to connect through normal conversation as these instructions become redundant.
Make it a habit to connect with your kids without the aid of instructions and commands. Ask them about their favorite toys. Or about the story that was read the night before. What your munchkin liked about it. How he would tell the story. What she would change in the story. Treat them as an individual and listen to their chatter and ask up follow up questions, however silly the chats might be. These kind of talks might appear simple but the effect of it will last through the life time.
Kids must be able to communicate with their parents as a dependable human being not as a strict policeman who they would rather skip approaching. And parents should lay the bridge of communication when they are very little!
Vinitha says – I am an ex-Software engineer turned into a Stay-At-Home-Mom with a love for words. I secretly wish to be called a writer. You can read my affair with words at Void Thoughts and Reflections…