Today I am writing on a very sensitive issue. This pertains to all parents, since it directly involves their children. Many parents may feel that they are aware of the problem. I agree every parent wants his/her child to be safe and protected. This dreadful issue is becoming a major cause of concern for the parents.
The Times of India of 10th July 2013, reported that a two year old girl was abused by the cab driver, who was appointed by the parents. The child was admitted to a nursery school only a few days back. She refused to go to school after attending school for a week. When the parents asked her the reason, she did not tell anything but cried. After much coaxing the child could make her mother understand her trauma. She was taken to a Doctor, who found that the child had internal injuries. The driver has been arrested. Delhi Commission of Protection of Child Rights is investigating the case.
This should serve as an eye opener. Well this is a case of sex abuse outside the house. Even within the four walls of the house children are not safe. What to talk of girls, even boys also become victims of this horrible and shocking act. Sexual abuse does not always mean that the child is engaged in a sexual act but showing one’s own genitals, masturbating in front of the child, or making the child touch the genitals can leave a scar on the child’s mind for ever.
Child abuse may be emotional, mental, physical or sexual, which can be the result of involving sexual gestures, actions or even showing pictures arousing the sexual instinct. Parents, especially the mother, should explain to the child very discreetly what to avoid. For example, the Mother must tell the child that he/she should not allow anyone to touch him/her. They should be able to differentiate between a good touch and a bad touch. It is unfortunate that in more than 50% cases the culprit is well known to the family.
In such a situation the child does not reveal anything to the parents. But the child can make out that the intention of the person indulging in such an act is ugly. If the child reports to the mother about the ‘touch’, she should believe the child and take instant action. Many Mothers silence the child and push the matter under the carpet. Maintaining secrecy or chiding the child results in psychological scar in the child for ever. The parents must come out in the open. They must defend their child.
Another very important thing that parents must follow is, not to have physical contact in front of growing children. A school once reported that during lunch break, a teacher found children of class four fondling each others’ private parts. When the teacher rebuked them they answered that they were playing ‘mummy and daddy’. It is time that parents must educate the child about sex education. However, if they hesitate to do so, they must request their family doctor to speak to their child.
Usha Menon, a 77-years-old retired educationist, who has four sweet, adorable grandchildren. Last year she wrote a book,”Reverse Gear.” This book is a sort of analogy between her professional and personal life, depicting the travails, ups and downs faced by an average working woman. As a retired person, She is leading a contented life with a loving husband, devoted son, daughter-in-law and two grand daughters. Her doting daughter, son-in-law, and two grand sons, who are very affectionate, look after her and her husband. She is grateful to God that He has, in His grace, given her an opportunity to live a life of peaceful contentment.