She was affectionate, fearless, adventurous, a creative girl, full of life, just like a beautiful butterfly always willing to fly high in the sky. She believed in living life to the fullest. She was very fond of the latest trendy clothes and loved to shop a lot. She fell in love early in life, perhaps lucky to have the man of her dreams. It was all rosy in the beginning but giving birth to a pre-mature kid turned her life upside down.
It was not easy to raise a 1.3 Kg baby. Raising a normal kid itself takes so much energy and efforts from parents that it’s tough to even imagine how much dedication is required to raise a pre-mature born child. For nursing the child, she would extract milk and feed the baby. The kid hasn’t started walking even after turning 1.5yr. It gives parents and all the family members sleepless night as he is not willing to even stand on his own legs, forget about walking. It took 30+ sessions at the physiotherapist to get him to walk. The day he walked for the first time was a joyous moment for the whole family. The kid couldn’t speak a single word for the first 18 months. She also took this up as a challenge and worked extra hard to make him speak. Finally at 2.5 years of age he has become just like any other normal kid. No issues with walking, speaking and letting others touch him.
One fateful night we received a call informing us that she passed away. Our mind was full of questions – How can she die at the age of 26? She was not sick, there was no accident. She answered calls just a few hours back. The answer we got shook us to the core – She drank poison to end her own life. It was tough to believe this had happened with us. She was my husband’s younger sister.
No amount of words can fill the void we are feeling from inside. Even when we are in the group, there is a feeling of loneliness. I don’t know how many months of sleepless nights more to forget her.. It’s not easy.
The question which haunts us is why did she do this to herself? Why did she not contact us, if she wasn’t happy with her marriage? How could she not think of her child while ending her own life?
A mother doesn’t have a right to end her own life. No matter how much pain she is undergoing in her marriage, there is always a way out. Do remember :
Either don’t have children or when you have them, never leave them alone and create a joyful life for the new life you have created.
You have given blood and sweat in giving birth. The little one is dependent on you for everything starting from milk. Imagine how will he be living his/her whole life without you.
There are many people in your world. But you are the only world to your child. How can he live once you are gone. There is no replacement of the mother. A father, grandparents, step mother can’t fill the space for the mother.
I don’t think there is any age, when kids don’t need their parents. I still need my parents as much as I did during my childhood.
Reach out to your family. They are always there to help you out. You are giving more pain to parents and siblings by not calling them for help.
There is a solution to every problem. If you want to teach a lesson to your husband, make efforts to realize your worth. If it feels better without him, part ways with him. But don’t go, leaving behind your child. These days divorce is so common that I fail to understand why women still take this step.
Now a days there are a number of help line numbers available. These are a few links –
Rashmi Sehgal is the mother of two adorable kids, 4 and 1-year-old fondly known as Angel and Lil prince on her blog. She wears the dual hat of mother and IT Professional who juggles between work and kids trying to maintain balance between both worlds . She is a voracious reader , avid blogger , Shopaholic, love to experiment different way of learning and unlearning things with her daughter and take pleasure in reading books to her daughter. She writes at rashworld.wordpress.com