Indeed, I picked up a book that was called that. Sucker. That’s what I am. Proverbs like ‘Never judge a book by its cover’ (or title as was this case) not with standing. There – I’ve said it – people fall for marketing tripe all the time. Especially people like me: New mothers, unsure and hesitant.
I say mothers simply because, in my experience fathers simply do not have the time or patience to fall for anything. Case in point – how many kiddie targeted ads have you seen that have a father as the main protagonist – not many, eh? And marketers are the best people to know who IS indeed paying attention!
If you are a new (or even old) mother, you are likely to find yourself navigating a self-routed information highway. You will actively seek and subliminally receive gyan about everything even remotely ‘baby’. And like I said before, all the information will come with assurances of being the best. Remember the book that claimed it could save my life? I read many such in the follow-up to having baby – they were written by all manners of doctors, nurses, super-nannies and baby whisperers. I kid you not. Never would I have ever studied for an examination with such diligence as I studied these books. Or websites. Or toilet paper with baby rearing wisdom (ok, this part is a joke!). But honestly if there was toilet paper with baby rearing tips, hands up – how many of you would buy it? Don’t say you won’t be tempted.
However, I digress. The point that I am trying to make here is that parents in this generation of over-parenting are getting sucked into a cesspool of over information thriving on insecurities. We are the generation that wants to do everything ‘right’. We are the generation who choose diapers after going through a thousand online reviews. We are the generation who would rather not use diapers too. We are the generation who will think everything over twice, and then twice all over again.
And that again feels like falling hook line and sinker for an improbable promise. Much like falling for a book that purports to ‘save your life’. Because such a book has not been written and indeed cannot be written! What that means is that we need to pause and think about our parenting paranoia once in a while. Whatever choices we make will have an outcome but there is only that much control that one can hope to have over outcomes. Which is not to say that we needn’t pause and weigh our options – but rather make our choices and move on. Because wasting too much time in making choices in parenting leads to unnecessary stress. And one can never make the perfect choice, or indeed be the perfect parent.
I would rather just enjoy the ride. How about you?
Nidhi Dorairaj Bruce is a Freelance writer from Mumbai who also manages a parenting website: thechildrensdaily.net . With no formal education in Parenting, she has been getting on-the-job training ever since her daughter, affectionately referred to as ‘the kidlet’, arrived on the scene 5 years ago. You can connect with Nidhi @typewritermom , nidhibruce.com