From Daughter To Mother: Lessons Learned

Being a parent has two sides.

You learn something new every day from your children – About yourself, your child and the world.

And you teach something new every day to your children – About themselves, About the world, About people, About life…

So what are the life lessons that my 3 year old daughter taught me?

from-daughter-to-mother-lessons-learned

Lesson 1: Live in the PRESENT

Babies live life NOW! They don’t worry about the future or dwell in the past. Life is just about what to see, do, say or listen at this moment. And their memory is really short lived. So it takes less than a minute to forget the past and laugh; and also just a little something to change the smile into a giant big tear! And before you know it or realize it, the moment is over, and everything is just fine 🙂

Lesson 2: Be CURIOUS

Babies are curious about everything. Everything is new, exciting, unexplored and wonderfully inviting to touch, feel, meddle, spoil, learn, see, smell, or hear. And the world around is a treasure waiting to be discovered, almost a Pandora’s Box!

So babies explore everything around them at their own pace, at their own will, and in their own unique way! Be it with touch, smell, questions, feeling, or whatever! But the journey to unravel the mysteries and treasures of the world starts with being curious.

Lesson 3: Focus on the EXPERIENCE

A very important lesson which babies can teach us is to focus on the experience. And for this, you should give your undivided attention to the experience. The only pre-requisite is that you should do one thing at a time. Else, you don’t pay enough attention to the experience neither do you enjoy it!

So if they’re crying, it is about crying. If they’re laughing, it is about laughing. If they’re playing, it is about playing.  If they’re on YouTube, it is about YouTube. Everything else can wait! And there’s no hurry about the next thing. There’s no anxiety about what they are missing.

And that’s an invaluable lesson because in today’s day and age, everyone is trying to do a gazillion things in one minute. The most important lesson for adults is to find ingeniously creative ways to make every moment count. And the truth is every moment counts – If only you give it your undivided attention and dwell in the moment.

Lesson 4: Laugh HEARTILY

If you’ve ever heard a baby laugh, you’ll agree that, it is one of the most beautiful and musical sounds to the ear! A baby’s laugh is genuine, pure, from the tummy and is a delight to listen to! Also, babies are really not aware of who’s around, who’s watching them, who is going to say what – They just LAUGH, and frankly don’t care about who says what if they laugh it out!

A lesson worth learning and practicing – When you feel like laughing, laugh heartily without caring about how others would react in the world – It is an unparalleled experience!

Lesson 5: Want something bad enough? – GO FOR IT

If a 3 year old baby wants something bad enough, she will do everything in her capacity to get it – And I don’t mean that’s always good. But the point is that babies cry, yell, scream, shout, plead, beg, request, create a scene – And do just about anything and everything they possibly can to get what they want!

And that’s an important lesson because way too often many of us tend to give up too early and easily on what we really WANT. A lesson worth emulating from babies, I think!  If you really want something bad enough, GO FOR IT! After all it is the result which matters, not the means 😉

Those are my lessons. What are yours?

Nischala Murthy Kaushik is mother and philosopher rolled into one (the philosophical streak emerged after she became a mother – essential for balance, she believes). She is an Engineer and Management Graduate (IIMB Alumni) by Education, IT/Innovation/Marketing Professional by Employment, Google/Blog/Twitter/Social Media Lover by Era, Writer by Passion, Dreamer by Compulsion,  Student of Life by Choice, Eternal Optimist by Necessity and Chief Happiness Officer of LIFE by Realization. She blogs @ Nischala’s Space, Thoughts and Expressions AND VERVE : The Quintessence of my Life . In addition, she is also as a guest blogger in several sites of global repute; and her blogs have been featured in several Best-Of lists and on the Directory of Top Indian blogs. She tweets @nimu9 and is also listed among the 50 Indian Women to follow on Twitter.

  • Focus on the Experience – never thought of that! Even if it’s short-lived, this focus you talk about is certainly something we forever-anxious-multi-tasking-hyper-ventilating mothers can learn from. Excellent idea to just relax, and watch Barney with our tots in place and feet folded up. 🙂 Lovely one, Nischala. 🙂

    • Nischala

      I agree. Now a days I watch more Chota Bheem / Tom & Jerry; and read more comics.. Also you chill out and laugh a lot more if you focus on the experience. Nischala

  • Sunita Rajwade

    The lessons I learnt along the way thanks to my children were : patience, acceptance, tolerance

    • Nischala

      Wonderful lessons Sunita.. I am still learning these three. Nischala

  • Reema Sahay

    Nischala, you summed it up beautifully. How we forget these lessons when we grow older and live life multi-tasking, unconsciously. Mindful living is what they teach us, slowing down to experience.

    • Nischala

      Thanks Reema

  • sirisha achanta

    love the article! Seriously we need to start following our kids .. we lead a stressful life almost always unnecessarily!

    • Nischala

      Thanks Sirisha.. They teach us a lot indeed. Tx for the comment

  • Hmm the focus part is something really that got my attention. Good or bad kids do have a determination of a Jack Russell Terrier something we grown ups can learn from. Though laughing part is also most of us can use a bit more 🙂 🙂

    • Nischala

      Prasad – Yes, we can learn a lot from them.. The point is we were there too – at some stage and phase of life. We just forgot those lessons 🙁 and it is our opportunity to unlearn / re-learn as parents! Nischala