Yummy Mummy Syndrome

1:30 is an unusual time for us to be awake. Well, yes, since V has learnt to sleep through the night. He rarely gets up now but it was different yesterday. He hadn’t slept at all! All he wanted was me to sing him one lullaby after another, while he pretended to sleep!

Yummy Mummy Syndrome - Losing Baby Weight - Obese Mothers - Slim Moms

But that wasn’t all. He wouldn’t let me tie my hair. He would insist that I let it loose. He would also pull out my glasses.

Cute!

Well, hell yes!

V has his own preferences as long as his mother is concerned. He likes me wearing a large bindi as opposed to the tiny dotted variety. If he sees me with a small bindi he pulls it off. I rarely wear dresses, but when I do wear one, he blushes more than me! I also have a feeling he doesn’t like me in sarees. He likes me to wear danglers, so that he can play with his little fingers. I am not the kind to wear ones hair loose. The heat and sweat bother me. I am the good girl, non-messy look types. But my son insists I keep my hair loose and flutter it around. And really, that’s too much to ask of me!

Sigh!

With V turning two in the next two months, I have cause to worry. I am not a ‘model mom’. Neither I am fashionable, nor am I thin and fit enough like some of the other moms today. Well yes, I am plump and obese! While my expanding girth and obscene levels of unfitness worry me. What worries me more is that I may have a tough time being a ‘yummy mummy’!

Who is a Yummy Mummy?

From Liz Hurley, to Victoria Bekham and Malaika Arora Khan and Shilpa Shetty… popular culture has wowed these mummies for various reasons. From shedding post pregnancy weight to going back to their pre-motherhood day lifestyle, to being the style divas through it all; yummy mummy are made to be truly delicious.

So when our Aishwarya Rai remained unapologetic about her baby fat, and the press continue to flag her, I loved her. I respected her for taking it all unflinchingly. Being in the business where your appearance is judged at every step and your ticket to stardom is decided by your looks, it must be the special touch of motherhood that lets you enjoy life the way you are supposed to.

There are yummy mummies everywhere. Mummies in malls, in schools, on the streets, on television, on Facebook… how does one escape the pressure?

I have battled weight all my adult life. Soon after pregnancy, my protruding tummy was on the c-section and frowns started to pour, “Oh! Look at you! Your stomach has not gone in.” I scowled back and pretended it didn’t bother me. Well, at least then it didn’t bother me, now it does! I wouldn’t blame motherhood but I would accept that few months back when I really worked to lose the kilos I have failed to stick to my resolve. Yes, yes, shame shame… But while I may shed the extra kilos down the months, what worries me most is that I may not truly be a yummy mummy. Will I have un-chipped nails? What about that perfect makeup? And will I be able to strut in heels? And yes, will I be able to let my hair loose?

The joke in the house is that my husband has never really asked me to wear my hair loose. Neither has he ever asked me to wear a particular dress or colour. I am sure he doesn’t even notice my jewellery! I am not really the kinds to ‘dress up to impress the man’… and thankfully my man has never shown a particular interest or disinterest in anything particular. But my son’s fascination for my hair, jewellery and bindi is making me take note of the little man and his pretty preferences!

Is there a pressure to look good for my son? If you ask me now, I will have to say that there is one! And I don’t know what to do about it.

We often watch this ad on the television and there’s a joke (about this one too!) in our house that I will never challenge my son. At least I won’t go running with him. Well, I started the joke! And then pictures of 60 year old Pinki Roshan pumping iron with her son Hrithik Roshan hit the news….damn!!

Why does motherhood have to be so challenging?

The TV junkie is back into the idiot box. Besides pretending to be a superwoman between work and family, Rituparna also dreams of flying free as an entrepreneur! Her son’s student, she is learning the ropes of parenting every day. Rituparna blogs at http://onboardthemommyship.wordpress.com/ and you can spot her on Twitter as @VeesMother.

  • Oh Ritu, if you mean the yummy looker mummy, I can vouch for your gorgeousness, having been in college with you. 🙂 Apart from that, the fact that you are a successful working professional and balancing it so well with bringing up V so lovingly and painstakingly, you are yummy in the head too. 😉 Nice piece!

  • Well-said Rituparna. You know the celebrity-mummies don’t bother me so much as the real mummies do. How do they do it? I wonder. I had been on a trip this past weekend. I saw two mummies, stick thin, with their tiny babies in the arms of their respective nannies. After that, I was so lost in my thoughts about how was that even possible (no tummy within few months of delivering) , my husband had to shake me to get me back to reality. I have never been too fat or too thin, but I have to confess, the way body changes after pregnancy bothers me a tiny bit.

  • Yamini Vijendran

    Sons have this fascination for their mothers’ bindis I guess! S keeps trying to pull mine off every time he can reach it. And in a family where it is taboo to go without bindi, I keep peeling the stickers one after another as my son happily keeps yanking them and casting them away. That being said, I am sure V loves his mom as she is, regardless of make up or pointed heels.

    However, we’ve got to ‘yummify’ ourselves a wee bit for our own sake. For the sake of our health in the coming years. A protruding tummy from 2 c-sections that gave birth to me n my bro has been giving my mom a hell of a time recently. And that was what woke me up to the fact that I better do something about mine immediately. It does take a lot of effort and patience and perseverance and on many days I give it a skip. But I am trying to be as sincere to my efforts as possible. Even if not ‘yummy’ mummy, got to try not to become a ‘tummy’ mummy! (cheesy, I know! ;))

    • “However, we’ve got to ‘yummify’ ourselves a wee bit for our own sake. For the sake of our health in the coming years.” – YES, Yamini. Absolutely!

  • I honestly don’t want to comment on the whole ‘yummy mummy’ syndrome, but I sure am in danger of becoming a ‘fuddy duddy daddy’ to my lil one.

    Have to seriously do something about me being out of shape, for which there really are no excuses like ‘post pregnancy weight’ 🙂

    • Hahaha, Jairam. You should write a post about it. 😀

      • Which reminds me of how my husband’s weight also kept increasing during my pregnancy. On every doctor’s visit, I would take my weight and he would too; and both of us were bewildered as to why his weight was moving up ha ha!

        • Haha, Reema, ghar ghar ki kahaani. 😛 But he’s fit-as-a-fiddle now, not because he wants to be a yummy-daddy, but because all medical problems have their roots around the waist-line. We are have genes we cannot wish away. The least we can do is try to be fit for fitness’s sake.

  • Phew! yes, yes…I know all that about decking up for the sake of oneself and all that…but the real truth is that I am just too lazy! My enthusiasm pans just after a few days. It is too much effort really. But the question is will my toddler understand this? I loved my mother’s sense of fashion. I loved her impeccable choice of sarees and jewelery and much of my own choices are like my mothers. I am afraid watching too many poster yummy moms around, he may suddenly feel that his mom is not up to the mark…you know like Ranbir’s character in Wake Up Sid, makes fun of his mom every time she speaks in English? That feeling of being rejected just because you don’t match up to others is kind of scary. While yes, I know all about teaching a kid to respect all body kinds and love every person for what he / she is…but school can really be a very harsh environment. I have heard tales of kids telling one another that they are dark and so it’s not nice, that they come in small cars, or their mothers don’t play tennis! Phew!

    @Sakshi – You are blessed with terrific genes…right from the start and motherhood has had not had the slightest of impressions on you! While I envy your genes, I also realise it is easier for you to be the yummy mummy than me. Yes…all the fun and games that I share with V is special to me, I know he enjoys that too. So if you say that counts in the yummilicious factor I will consider it. 🙂

    @Yamini – Yes…tummy mummy…I know that thing!

    @Jairam – Yes…the husband too fell into the fuddy daddy category too. But the thing with him is that he is more committed to fitness than me. So when he decides that it is time to shed the kilos, out come the dumbells and the clothes go off the bench press!

    • Yes, I do thank the genes. And the fact that I did not keep extra help at home, possibly because I work from home. In the process of running around with him/after him I kept myself fitter than I felt before I got pregnant. Plus, I had not put on any weight when I was carrying him. So, many factors contributed. BUT, it doesn’t make me a yummy mummy any more than your motherhood makes you. Kuch nahee rakha waist-line mein. Feeling fit and being healthy is much more important. Some of those slim-and-trim shapes come at a very high cost to health. And I’m sure V will be more sensitive and discerning than Ranbir Kapoor in a silly movie. 😛 Do not worry! 😀 (When are we meeting?)

  • Tee-hee-hee! Yes Sakshi, I must agree that having a full time nanny at home has made me a tad lazy. But that hasn’t given me any relief from running after him! But kya karen? Blame it on my bulbous genes! Let’s see…I may actually turn into a typical female and lose all the weight to please the little man.

    But that takes me to the whole new track of how we want to be the perfect parents to our kids na? Even if (right now) my sense of a perfect mummy equates to a yummy mummy! :p

    Yes…let’s please organise a play date for the boys! I am dying to get out of the rut and have some fun. Will ping on FB.

  • V ki Amma

    I may have not have expressed myself as explicitly, but this is what I wanted to say: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/joy-gabriel/kate-middleton-and-the-mom-in-the-mirror_b_3672553.html