Fight – Part 1

We fight a lot, at times almost like enemies, but mostly like friends. Sometimes she can be very irritating making me forget the rules of a fair fight. There are days when we will wow not to talk to each other for eternity, daring each other to see who speaks first.

Fight - Part 1 - When Daughters Grow Up - Father Daughter Relationship

There are many reasons we fight.

We fight for remote of TV.

We fight for whose plate has less salad and try to dump the greens in others plate.

We fight for what is appropriate to wear while going to market. She is horrified at my dressing sense and worries what if any of her friends sees me in my unmatched dress. I, on my part, tell her not to wear big earring as they make her look old almost like an aunty jee. This makes her very upset and the wow to never to speak with me is repeated.

But the fights which were very common till a few months ago have now started to get less and less, common with her accepting my verdict more easily than it was a few months ago. She seems to be growing in every sense. Her confrontations are slowly converting into logical debates, and there are times when I have no rebuttals for her sound logic. Though secretly, I enjoy these defeats, I try to maintain a facade of invincibility.

My poor wife is unable to take sides between feisty daughter and refusing to grow up husband, every once in a while reminding us that we are not siblings but father and daughter.

As she is slowly growing, her expectations from her father are changing. We are at a stage when she has just realised her father is not Superman, and she was heartbroken on learning that. Slowly she has started understanding that wants are unlimited but money with her father is limited. I am finding that she no longer throws tantrums in the mall to buy that nth toy or game.

But she expects me to do research for her school project on the use of fixed and movable pulleys to reduce work. You see she is no longer very keen on the father just as a mini bank, but she wants her father to be with her when she needs him to explain the laws of physics and mathematics. I am slowly getting accustomed to these new expectations when I am not just asked to buy something but also to explain a few things.

Even on those days when we still fight she has a ritual which the younger one too has adapted.

She will come and give me a big hug with all her force and wish me a very sweet good night. The sweetness of the good night kisses is inversely proportional to the bitterness of the fight we have in the day. All is forgotten and forgiven this moment when we hug.

Yesterday, she left for Delhi for summer vacations with her mom and sister. While the younger one was at her chirpy best, she has been very quiet and talking in mainly in yes and no. Unlike other days there was no fight on what to wear and what to pack. Once we reached station she was silent and just bid be a silent good-bye after I gave my monologue on dos and don’ts in train.

I reached the empty home and was sitting alone in front of computer thinking what to do.

The remote was all mine but I did not feel like watching anything on TV. Missus has made some rice for me to eat in dinner but I just did not have the energy to go to kitchen to get it. I was just looking at the wall at her picture with her younger sister.

And then this message arrived on phone

“Dear daddykins…. I am missing you, I hope you are fine. Please eat your dinner, and like always good night… hugs… :)”

I choked; my fingers were struggling to type a reply on the phone.

My little girl has grown much faster than I expected.

Anybody knows a way to stop time even if it is for a few years?

Sasha and Prasad Np are proud parents of 2 girls whom they fondly call Princess and Pinkette. He wears many hats after taking a break from being corner office critter for a long time. He is now an entrepreneur, blogger, photographer, traveler and a potential investor in start-ups with unique concepts especially if they are in travel related business. He blogs at Desi Traveler, and can be reached at Facebook and Twitter.

  • touching… bought tears to my eyes… is there a substitute any where in this world for a daddy!! 🙂

    • Thanks Supriya, glad that you liked it..

  • You have variety in your writing! Good one, keep more coming!

  • Thanks Divya….. next one is coming soon… 🙂

    • Amrita Thavrani

      I second Divya.. you have versatility in your writing and that surely shows the various shades of your parenting.

  • Thanks Amrita, appreciate your kind words…

  • This the story of every family’s loving father-daughter scenes. To have a cherishing father like you is a blessing for your daughters. May your tribe increase.

    And this is the same case with mother -daughter too. However old the mother, however old the daughter, the tiffs and make ups go on..:-)

  • Thanks a lot Pattu mam….