• Beyniaz

    I was always encouraged by my parents to be adventurous whether it came to trying strange food or new places to explore. I hope I have done the same with my children. Getting hurt is the small price one pays for the gift of actually living life and not just existing. Thank you Shail for this beautifully worded piece.

    • Dear Beyni,

      Oh! How lovely to read your comment and the first one at that!
      Nice that your parents let you be. You have turned out to be great.
      But, like all parents I worry….I too hope I am doing the right thing when I let my son be… Somehow, the belief is there that he will do fine….
      I am sure all mothers wish the same…..

  • Glad to read this thought provoking write up about bringing up children. Though we keep writing and discussing about such things, nothing much has changed in practice. Children continue to suffer due to attitude of elders and they are never allowed to think and we feel it is enough if they just carry out our instructions.. Hope things will change……

    • Dear Hari,

      Nice to see you here. Yes, it is not at all easy to let children be. It is difficult but certainly not impossible. Yes, if we follow this attitude we are bound to get a few scraped knees, disappointed minds but eventually, the child within flies… I too hope that things change too…

  • Rachna Parmar

    A very difficult to achieve for a parent. I agree that we need to give them space and wings to grow and watch from the sidelines.

    • Dear Rachna,

      Yes, it is indeed difficult to let children be but sometimes, I think we are making their atmosphere claustrophobic just by being in conflict about what is right and what is wrong for them. Don’t you think?

  • You are absolutely right – we are the over-parenting, over-protecting , low-risk taking generation…we need to let go some, and let them be..!

    • Dear Nidhi,

      Exactly… Sometimes, what we couldn’t do we feel our children MUST do. Maybe, they don’t want to but do we ask?
      Sometimes, what we could do, we feel our children HAVE TO try out, come what may. Both are wrong attitudes, don’t you think Nidhi?

  • The cliche is true, we learn from our mistakes but allowing our children to do so is something that we as parents need to learn! Wonderful post, Shail.

    • Dear Shilpa,

      Yes. We did those very mistakes but when it comes to our children, we don’t want them to stumble and fall. As if to say, the knowledge would come to them like pearls of wisdom from OUR mouths!

      Of course, it is not always necessary to experience to understand but mistakes do teach and we should be lenient with our children there…. allowing them the choice of trial and error…

  • Trial and error method is the best way of learning, Well said. We as parents should set the guidelines and let them into the world. Today’s children are much more matured and insightful in their outlook.

    • Dear Asha,

      I agree. Today’s children are indeed more mature than what we were at their age. Maybe, it is due to the information available everywhere, something which we did not have full access to then. We should be willing to listen to their view points and not allow our parental egos to barge in…. what say? Of course, the supervision should not be done away with either but a careful careless way would do…

  • The need of the hour is that parents let their children take stride of their choices in life. The parents are right on their part to safeguard them and motivate them to take up the tried and tested ways but only to the point that it does not kill down a inclination, talent or a vision of the child to do new.

    Aptly mentioned– the rules of survival are different today.

    I would say Changing times have to be lived with changed actions.

    • Dear Manjulika,

      Yes indeed. The rules have changed today. We as parents need to gear up to the changing scenario and not apply the old rules to new situations. You never know. Sometimes, the children themselves come up with solutions….

  • Alokha Mendens

    For sure the ways of the world are different these days and as parents we try so hard to make it a better place for our kids. There’s so much information about the do’s and don’ts of good parenting’ but I think we as parents just do what we think best from our hearts. Perhaps we will only know if we have done the right thing, once our kids grow up to be parents themselves.

    • Hi Alokha, so good to see you here. Yes, I agree with you entirely. As parents we can only do what we think best and feel best from deep down our hearts. The results will show when our children are grown up. Then, we shall know whether we were right or wrong….

  • Shail,

    Its a great post!… I sometime wonder, In today’s time being a parent is the toughest!…. I see parents who are just so lost at times…because other parents are doing so much or have so much!!!..:(.. wish I can just let be a facilitator to my child’s dream!

  • Hi Vandana, I know. It just isn’t easy being a mother today. Too many views, opinions, distractions, responsibilities. I just hope and pray like you that we are able to bring up our children well keeping the child in them always alive…